I am envious of the women who do not have to work out, those who are naturally lean and eat pizza and French fries without hesitation.

When I still worked with an agency, we had to meet once a week to do our drop, and one of the ladies, showed up with McDonald’s French fries, and an Oreo McFlurry.  She was the most in demand out of all us.  I sat there and I think I just gained five pounds just watching her eat those greasy fries and delicious ice cream.

It does frustrate me now that I’ve been working out continuously for the past eight months, five or six days a week, and it has yet to result in getting more shoots.  I’ve been kicking ass in the gym, trying to improve myself both mentally and physically, and when your effort is not recognized in the career path you chose, you can’t help but be disappointed.

But over the past several months, I’ve watched my body change and continue to improve. Because I’m not naturally petite, it’s taken longer to notice the changes.  The women who are lean to begin with and then start lifting weights, damn! They look fucking fantastic in a relatively shorter time frame than someone with my structure does.

However, with continued dedication, I will look just as good if not better than the women who do not work out.  And I finally lost some body fat as I mentioned recently.  I was 155 pounds for the longest time, since I was gaining so much muscle.  But now I’m down to 147, and that has to be mostly fat because I’ve gotten stronger, not weaker.

I can start to notice a slight v-cut in my lower abdomen.  It’s hard to notice in some photos, but I definitely did not have it before.  And when that is clearly visible, man, you guys will be completely helpless when it comes to me.